TVXQ duo comeback + JYJ new plans

Can you just imagine those guys secretly contacting each other right after their performances. telling each other like "you danced like this (imitates)" "you're voice is as good as ever!" or things that only them notice like "you were one note flat" and "dont worry its not noticeable its still great!" or them telling each other that "you really shine on the stage!" and then they will try to sing each others' songs... each will be looking forward to each performances, "you're having a concert there?" and "we'll be going there next month!" or "we had performed there before. the atmosphere is good!" and they will recommend to each other things to do, to eat when they go to places the others have not yet gone to... then they will say to each other "good luck on your next performance!" and "do well! we'll always be watching you!" and they will just laugh things out as things are not the same as before. they'll just laugh it off. the sadness of not being able to perform together. they will try their best as always. whether together physically or together by heart.

So whatever people say about TVXQ coming back with only two members, the other three continuing as only them right now, as this is already the end of THEM, i really dont care. All I know is that these five people are trying their every best to live up to the expectations of people on them; the people who trusted them since day 1 or those who have put their faith on them halfway. Hate us if you're tired of our waiting, but that won't change anything. The trust people decided to give them, you can't take it back in an instant. You cannot take it back by saying "move on, they're not going to be together anymore!" or any other harsh things. It was, maybe for some, a wrong decision for people to love and trust those guys, packed with all the drama they're having right now. But it was a decision they chose. And you can't do anything with it. That's your opinion, fine. We totally respect that, so respect our decision as well.

I'm sick of people's rants telling us to stop waiting for them. I thought only idols and celebrities can get antis. I didn't know that even fans get them. So does that make us famous as well? Go ahead. Have it your way. Hate us, until blood comes out all over your body and until you're so sick of us that you just want to shut yourself inside your box. The decision have been made long ago and we're going to stick with it. We'll be watching them as they are now. The plan of supporting them is still the same and we will, always wait. For what? You'll see when we get there.

Make the most out of the remaining days of 2010. Advance Happy Christmas. ☺

A dream is a wish your heart makes...(?)

TVXQ rarely visit me in my dreams. I rarely have a clear dream-- something that makes sense or something that is concrete. And one of those rare moments happened yesterday.

September 12 2010

I woke up at around 10:30 in the morning. I was still sleepy but there's something in my head but its not that clear. I'm seeing figures, people, places. Until I remembered that I had just woke up from a dream. I was just sitting in my bed and was trying hard to remember it. Here goes.

*this is not a fan fiction. cause after re-reading it, people may think that it is. but believe me, it's not.*

First I saw many people. All in red. Falling in line. Holding Light sticks and TVXQ stuffs. There are people in black leading the way. Then I realized that it was an event made by @CassPH. I'm not sure if it's the 8G (sequel of 7G- 7th Gathering) but the venue is the same as in the 7G but bigger. Everyone was excited to enter, and I was one of the crowds. The me in my dream was so excited to go inside but upon recalling it, I don't know what's waiting in the venue and why am I that excited. (the excitement I felt on 7G was different, that's what i'm sure of)

Then my dream shifted. I'm not sure if this one is connected to the first. (i'm random even in my dreams. tsk,)

From an event venue, the setting shifted to a bar. There were five people sitting and drinking silently. Until I realized that those five were TVXQ. They were not talking to each other. They were just sitting there, drinking. Then they started singing TOGETHER. It was so soft, but I can hear it clearly, the harmony, the melody, and I was so happy. Finally, I heard it again. Unlike in the first part of my dream, I dont know where I was on the scene. Maybe I was dreaming in my dream? But I really didn't bother. Jaejoong, Yunho, Changmin, Junsu and Yoochun are singing together again. Here comes the heartbreaking part.

While they are singing, Changmin, just like a child, laid his head on his arms, head down, crying. But he still continued singing, they all did. Then someone called "hyung". It's not one of the five, and I didn't recognize the person. With that, Yunho and Changmin left their seats, Changmin drying up his tears and Yunho walking blankly. The other three were just there, drinking sadly.

And I woke up.

They say that "a dream is a wish your heart makes", but for this one, particularly the latter, I guess it's better to describe it as "my dream is my wish, and my heart breaks."

3 years...

Ask me who's my favorite Jrock artist and I'll always answer L'arc~en~Ciel without thinking twice. I have been a fan of that band since 1st yr college and though they aren't that active as a band now, i still see them as the most awesome jrock band ever. Though they age, i don't care. I was so happy when they came back this year with their single Bless. We waited so long, Their last album together was KISS released 2007. It was almost 3 years. For that 3 years they focused on solo activities but still THEY CAME BACK TOGETHER AGAIN.

L'arc en ciel is the first ever band that i loved dearly. Now, I'm waiting again for another band that I've been loving for almost a year now. Ask me about a kpop band that i love and i will only answer Dong Bang Shin Ki. Scrap the looks and moves, those are minimal reasons why i love them. Listen to their acapella and you'll know. Try listening to whatever they say and tonight. Instead of watching their mv's try watching their lives. Instead of looking at their photos in magazines and all, try listening to their music.

Sometimes, it feels weird because everyone is trying to listen to something new, trying to like someone new and here i am, still trying to stick with the old. I have listened to Acid Black Cherry, Ikimono Gakari but I keep on going back to L'arc. I listen to CN Blue But still yearn for Dong Bang Shin Ki. Why? Maybe the reason is because i know they will come back. L'arc~en~Ciel, after Bless released their Quadrinity Album but after that, no update of the BAND TOGETHER whatsoever. I only heard about Tetsuya's single and VAMPS' tour-- both solo activities of Tetsuya and Hyde. After TVXQ's release of their Best Album 2010 we haven't heard anything from them TOGETHER. It's all solo. Management's announcement was that the group activities are uncertain after that, we're left hanging. Are they breaking? Are they coming back? all are questions unanswered. But I also had the same question with L'arc for that 3 yrs. Yes rumors say they have a plan for 20th L'anniversary but I had questions like, 'aren't they releasing any album? when will they comeback?' then they answered Bless- and the answer came after 3 yrs. It has been 1 yr since Dong Bang Shin Ki was restrained from performing as a group but if I was able to wait for L'arc for 3yrs, how come I cannot do it for TVXQ?

You may say that L'arc and TVXQ have different situation. The former have no issue of lawsuits whatsoever but what's common on both is that THEY ARE A BAND. L'ARC~EN~CIEL is TETSUYA, HYDE, KEN and YUKIHIRO. DONG BANG SHIN KI is YUNHO, JAEJOONG, CHANGMIN, JUNSU and YOOCHUN. As long as they say it's over, then there's still the possibility that they will come back together. I'll keep on waiting. Just like the 3 years that I've waited for L'arc~en~Ciel. If 3 years is not enough for TVXQ, I'll still wait. I have to say, that I've been choosing bands that always keep me waiting but I will and can wait simply because they are worth it. I can not see myself loving any other bands-- just these two and because of that I'm determined to wait for them. There is no certainty of whatsoever but there will always be possibilities and I'll put my faith on those possibilities no matter how little possibility there is. :)

...and the cassie-on-hiatus breaks down.

Yup. I'm on hiatus 'cause i don't get 'much' of them anymore. I was (and still) very busy with school as a teacher and homeroom adviser. All i can do is watch their mv on my phone or listen to their music. other than that I don't do much for them anymore-- until now. I just finished watching some of their video clips on youtube, played their mv's and read some updates about them. finally. I broke down. I just have to see them.

The last time I heard was that SM Town will be going to Los Angeles i think this coming September. The first thing I thought when I heard this was "finally, Changmin can perform on a stage again." (because Jaejoong, Yoochun and Junsu were already able to sing again, so as for Yunho in the Michael Jackson concert tribute but i haven't heard of Changmin performing on anything) But after awhile, SM town going to L.A gave me a different thought- the timing.

Jaejoong, Yoochun and Junsu's sub-group (not sure if it's officially known as JYJ or JJY) are going on with their plans of collaborating with American artists reason why they went to L.A before. Collaborating with American artists mean that there is a chance for those 3 to be well-known to Americans. (i know some Americans already know them. but let's face it that not many know or like them) And the next thing I know and realized, SM Town will also be there and since it is SM TOWN it means Super Junior, SNSD, Shinee and more artists from Sment. Can you see where i'm pointing? I will claim that this is just on my perspective; that i'm just being paranoid on this huge 'G A P' between Sment and JYJ but it seemed to me that Sment do not want those three to be very much successful on their plans of moving on apart from their management. If you look at it, on a battle between 3 versus a number of artists who have already had a huge success in Korea and other countries of Asia the former is at disadvantage. I know some will bash me and tell me that the 'three' we are talking about here is not just any other low profile aritst-- that it's JAEJOONG, JUNSU and YOOCHUN that we are talking about. But let's also take a look at a different side of the reality, that though cassiopeias hate SM Entertainment, their artists do SELL. JYJ's plus is just they are having a collaboration with American artists. Other than that, they are 'outnumbered'. Anyhow, the numbers don't decide the winners and this is no real battle anyway. But I'm just really... curious. WHY?

I'm having loads of question right now and I don't know if I will ever have the answers.

to SMent:

-A tour outside Asia for the SM Town is a brilliant idea but why Los Angeles? Why now?

-Can you just let go of Changmin and Yunho? You already have the majority of kpop artists dominating the korean (Asian) music entertainment. You can say that TVXQ as it is now, is not that much anymore. If you' let those two go, maybe, the next step is to start from scratch again. Wont you be ahead of them by that time? Won't you just please let them be together again?

to Changmin and Yunho:

Leader and maknae, you miss them right? Maybe, you're just waiting for your contract on SMent to finish, right? And then after that all five of you can be together again. I cannot assure to myself that you can still be TVXQ at that rate- the name is owned by SMent but you'll still be together, right?

to Jaejoong, Junsu and Yoochun:

I know you're not being selfish. The decision of filing the lawsuit in the first place was not because of selfish reasons right? You're moving forward even if it's just the three of you but I know you will be waiting for those two, can I assure that? I'm sure that's how it will be...right?

**************************

While I was waiting for a conference last Friday, the sister gave me magazines to read. I really don't like reading but I did so as not to get bored while waiting. I read a story about some guy who encountered Mother Teresa and asked her to pray for him. The guy asked Mother Teresa to pray for him to be granted clarity, because the guy knows that the reason why Mother Teresa is the way she is was because she always had clarity in life. And here response?

So with all the questions I have in my head, I will just trust Him. Trust Him that He have better plans for these five guys that I loved so dearly. How odd. I know they (TVXQ) don't know me but I really pray for them because I know when it all comes down to it, that's the best way that I can do for them- rather than buying their albums, franchise, concerts and all. This is the biggest support that I can offer them-- my prayer though at times I am not really sure of what to pray for them.

And I will always keep the faith. If they say that believing in those boys to comeback again is impossible, then I will just keep on believing that God has better plans for those boys, in His time. :)

...W...

This was just supposed to be a tweet status until I realized that I was over exceeding the characters...

I was checking my tumblr dashboard and was looking for jpop jrock related posts but the kpop bias people that i follow overpower those whom i follow because of jpop or jrock. While browsing I mostly read posts from kpopsecrets. It's a tumblog meant for all those who can't say what they want to say about kpop but want to let it out and hide their identity. I for one submitted my own and it received reblogs with harsh comments. I think I just can't please everybody. But actually those things are nothing. What bothers me is the division i feel that's happening to cassiopeia. Now that jaejoong, junsu and yoochun recently (and still currently) having their thanksgiving concert in japan, the -jaechunsu- and -homin- division surfaced again. and i'm a bit sad...because of this there are misunderstandings...bashing from fans to fans...and it is really alarming.

I cannot say that I don't get tired of what is happening to them right now. It's almost a year. I am a little impatient but not to the point that i am losing the faith. Whatever happens, at least I can be proud and say that I believed in them all through out the end. Cassiopeia, you are the most awesome fandom that I have ever encountered so please hang on tight. As of now what we have are all of us. If you still believe in the idols whom you saw as family, then you, as their stars, should also see each other as family. They aren't divided. They are just giving themselves their own time. So you shouldn't be divided in any way. The stars in the sky wont form a constellation if they will not be connected to each other. So only if all of us hold on together, will cassiopeia be formed. So please please, i know it's tiring already, but please, don't lose hope. Not now. Not ever. You have proven everyone your loyal love for your idols. Let's prove them more. Let's wait patiently. We will never be sure of what will happen in the future, if they will make it again as five or if the worst happen, no one can ever tell. All we can promise them is that we will always be there. I think that if they didn't care of our existence, then they would just lock themselves in their room and never show their faces to the public ever again. But are they doing that? NO. And with the courage that they are showing to everyone, they deserve a stronger fandom. To be honest, I have not yet reached my 1 year in this fandom. So i think, to all of the others who have been with them through thick and thin, they are the one's who should be able to understand them the most. Let's wait a bit more. God always listens. I believe that if many people pray for one thing, it will be rewarded to them. Maybe God just thinks that it is still not the perfect time for them to comeback. Or maybe He's still preparing something better for those five. We can never tell but we can always pray for it. Keep praying and keep faith.

As what I have always been saying, I love Cassiopeia as much as I love TVXQ. I don't want TVXQ to break now and I don't want it to happen to their fans either. :)

The "hidden promise" :)

Before I knew of TVXQ I first knew of SS501 because of Kim Hyun Joong-- Boys over flower's Jihoo and Hwangbo's husband in We Got Married. There is this blog site that is dedicated to Ssangchu couples (the couple nickname for hwangbo and hyunjoong on we got married). I'm a big fan of that couple but these days I don't get to viist the site anymore. They still post updates about hwangbo and hyunjoong. The latest news about hyunjoong was the message he wrote for the fans on his homepage. As i browsed the blog my ssangchu-couple-fondness came back to me. Her blog uses mix pod play list that automatically play songs each time you open a page. i kept browsing different pages on different tabs so different songs play each time i open a new page. (i think I'm being unclear here. sorry. it's around 2:22 am here. but i really want to finish this.)

I think I opened around 6 tabs, so before different six songs starts, i already paused the play list. And while I was reading some posts, Tohoshinki's yakusoku played on the background.

I was clicking all the tabs that I opened and all the play list are on pause. I checked whether my desktop player is open but it's not. And I'm sure it's not from my hard disk because the song is stopping due to buffering. But no matter what it still continued to play. I looked for the source but I really can't find where it is playing. Then I realized that the reason why I can't find it was because it was hiding from me.

this is the screen cap of the blog that I was visiting, in every page you will see the play list (mixpod.com) on that spot.

and with all the tabs I opened, the one playing yakusoku looked like this.

saw the difference? That's why when I tried searching for the source of the song playing I can't find it. I wont be able to pause it if I can't see the play list right?

Why of all the tabs I opened, the one that chose to play TVXQ's yakusoku appeared like that? And as i am a hardcore analytic on things I encounter everyday, I searched for the translation of the lyrics, thinking that there's a reason behind it; while others may just think that it's just a random fail on connections.

I already heard this song and I only understand some of the words but i am sure that 'yakusoku' stands for promise. I thought "Does the incident imply yo TVXQ's promise to all their fans?" I told you, I am a hardcore analytic. I'll just post some of the lyrics translation. You can check the full translation here.

I will never let go of you

Sunny days and rainy days, I'll be by your side to protect you

Everyday you and I see our future together

Keep going...believe.

Hopeful days and uneasy days, I'll be by your side to protect you

I'll always hold on to the precious promise.

The two of us exchange promises, they'll come true one day.

To me it felt like they were saying,

Even at the hardest times, we will always be by your side. We are not leaving you no matter what. Things might not be clear as for now, but in the future, we will still be together. We'll keep going. You just have to believe. This is a promise and we'll never break it. We will comeback. This will come true someday.

Is this the 'hidden promise' that they are telling me? That even though I don't see any concrete evidence of it (just like the unseen play list) I have to believe it? (because even if I can't see it I can still here the song playing) Label me anything that you want, but even thought this is just me, I prefer seeing it in my own perspective. The incident makes me want to keep on believing in them, to wait for them no matter how hard it may be.

"Together" -- we are suffering together with them and I know someday we will be rewarded for enduring these hardships. It may not be right now, but someday, if we just believe, keep praying and keep the faith, someday, we'll get what we are most yearning for. I am again given another reason to always keep the faith and hope to the end. I will hold on to this 'hidden promise' and someday, I know they will fulfill it. It's just a matter of time. :)

7G Ü

7G means 7th Gathering, organized by Cassiopeia Philippines for Cassiopeia Philippines held May 1, 2010. When I heard of this I thought I wouldn't go. It's just a gathering, nothing special. But Universal Records, the one responsible for TVXQ albums released in the Philippines announced that they will be having an advance releasing of the BEST 2010 album on the event and because of that, I HAVE TO GO THERE. (I have long been craving for that album ever since they announced it). Buying the album was just the reason why I wanted to go to the event. I bought the ticket for the gathering but when I knew that I can buy the album without buying the 7G ticket I felt upset. I should have just bought the album but in the end, buying the ticket was a wise decision. My money was worth it. :)

7G was not just 7th gathering, its a day of 7 great things. Here goes...

1. you get to purchase your 2010 best album and instead of just getting one random photo card, you can have the whole set by buying the cd and 2cd+dvd versions.

2. booths:

henna booth, tvxq quiz and tvxq merchandise - from button pins to t-shirts to chocolates to bookmarks and postcards. no wonder they told the attendees to bring extra bags when they go there.

3. accommodating core members.

I bought my ticket through a meet up. When I got to the venue, it was already crowded. (I came late. :D) I saw the person whom I bought the ticket and he immediately gave me the free photo card and a solo photo card of your choice (the photocard for the best album and this are two different things) and on the window ticket booth this notice was posted:

HAHA. all of the jaejoong photo cards were already out of stock. Jae is really a first come first serve type of person. If he'll be always like that then I think i wont be getting any jaejoong merchandise in the future. The habitual late comer will never be able to get a hold of things in first come, first serve. :D

When they started to open the doors for the screening, i wasn't aiming for the first seats but the one at the last row. People keep on coming and i really don't want to sit somewhere in the middle or in front. I want to be at the back. The core member in charge of the entrance maybe thought that I was weird. I was really waiting for the end of the line. XD In the end I got the seat that I want. One core member passed by me and she saw that I was alone in that row, she asked me if i'm okay there. It was sweet of the the core members to take care of the attendees like that. I was alone in my seat but I'm not lonely nor out of place.

The core members are good looking too. I saw these pretty girls and I end up approaching them and told them that they are really pretty.

hey, dont' get me wrong, I AM A GIRL, but pretty girls are really admirable right? ^^

4. the cool host.

When I heard that there would be a program I thought it would be boring but i was wrong. Ms. Kring was a very good host. She made everyone happy with her crack-up statements and all. *kamay-ala-jaejoong* haha! I ust can't stop laughing while watching her. She's a natural. Here's a preview. :D

rough trans:

host: jaejoong (she spoke in korean) you're very goodlooking but they said he's your boyfriend *points to yunho)

haha! yunjae enthusiasts went wild. i love the screams. :D

5. the prizes.

they gave away posters and cds but their best prize was the STANDEE. there's a solo standee for each and a group standee. I actually didn't want to win. It would have been very weird carrying that standee back home-- and I didn't even told my mom where I was going to. I was never lucky in raffles and all but surely, fans screaming by just a standee is just so surprising. they were happy even with just a standee. If only I personally know TVXQ i would have asked them to go there. They are really loved so much by their fans. So much it makes others think that they are weird people. Well whatever, it's their opinion anyway. Heres the picture of the standee.

imagine that inside your room. o_O

6. the screening

the screening was the secret code concert at tokyo dome. I've already watched the DVD before but it was nice to watch it on the big screen along with other cassies. The audience was screaming in the theater room. YES they are screaming even though it's just a screening. and they almost filled all of the seats and it's not even a concert nor a fanmeet with the boys. It's just the fans- comforting each other at hard times like this. That's why i love Filipinos. They know how to enjoy even at a difficult times. :)

it's just a screening but look at the crowd. TVXQ, you have to visit us. REALLY. :)

7. the fans itself.

If Cassiopeia Philippines core didn't organize this and if the fans didn't support them, the success of the event wouldn't have been possible. I told some core members that I am a fan of TVXQ but I am also a fan of their fans, of cassiopeia, bigeasts and international fans. I admire how they can still keep on believing though it may seem others that there's no hope anymore. They are still there keeping the faith and doing anything to support the boys. This is also my reason why I wanted to sit at the last row, to be able to see how the fans show their support to the boys, even with just this gathering.

The event made me fall in love with the fans even more. Cassies all over the world never fail to amaze me. If these people will keep on praying to whoever god they have for TVXQ then a miracle might happen. And these fans never abandoned the 'always keep the faith' thing. They are still holding on. (haha. this is weird. I use pronoun 'they' don't I consider myself a cassie as well? xD) After the event it made me proud that the first boy band that I loved was TVXQ - not just because they are truly talented people but because they also have the best fans a group could ever have. :)

To cassiopeia philippines, thank you for all the efforts. I'll be on the 8G as well; surely. :)

should we have stopped the time when they started to break out?

When the lawsuit was filed by jaejoong, yoochun and junsu to SM entertainment TVXQ activities on korea went on a halt. The only hope for TVXQ fans is AVEX, japanese management whose responsible for tohoshinki's activities. We were able to see them sing together again in japanese television and the company announced that they will be releasing tohoshinki's new single: BREAK OUT. Even before it's release yesasia, cdjapan and all other online album shops received lots of pre-orders of the single. Everyone was so happy about the single- yes it's just a single but the five were all together in it. from the music to the PV so it was such a gift from AVEX.

Then there's the best album 2010. The boys are still making it in Japan. Though they are quiet in their homeland, they are making a bang in Japan. AVEX told tvxq fans that they will continue to take care of the boys- and they sure did. With great efforts AVEX made TVXQ fans happy with all their group releases and all. You rarely see the boys together in an activity now. Everyone is working on their solo activities but AVEX makes it possible for fans to see them working together...

Then there's the release of the single toki wo tomete. Even before it's official release, i've already liked the song. I heard it when i watched Heaven's Postman. Before it's release i wasnt able to listen to the song clearly yet. And i'm not japanese so i don't really understand the song. but i'm sure it's a sad one. Tohoshinki has this tohomobile~ bigeast members are able to receive updates from tohoshinki through tohomobile. *lucky them* and there was an update about the toki wo tomete single. each of the members gave their message upon the release of the song. and here's what yoochun said...

Everyone~!!

Gokigen Uruwashu (* ^u^*) (How are you in very formal Japanese)

Is there a time that you wished time stopped out of all your memories??

P.S I am now

-Yuchun

Translation: Rieko@sharingyoochun

Shared by: sharingyoochun.net + DBSKnights

I felt really sad when I read the bold part. Yoochun wanted to stop time that moment. I think he really miss doing work with the boys- i think they all do.

Holy week came. As a part of my sacrifice I intended not to surf the net during that week. No internet is a no TVXQ news for me. So for that week i heard no news about TVXQ. I think my sacrifice was worth it. It saved me from the heartache of hearing a bad news- that AVEX will stop TVXQ activities for now and will be focusing on each solo activities. The pillar of hope that fans were holding on suddenly fell down. All my social networking dashboards were filled with TVXQ that time. they were able to trend #alwayskeepthefaith on twitter with just a short notice and i think it stayed TT for 2 days. I was just able to hear the news on easter sunday. (i think avex announced it first day of april) but my cassies twitter friends were still sad about it. I can't say that i'm not but since i didnt hear the news the time it was announced i wasnt that shocked. and looking back at what yoochun said, i guess i fully understand why he wanted to stop the time that moment- because he knew it would be the last group activity for now. I always love reading Yoochun's messages because he gives me these simple hints or maybe i'm just thinking too deep. Nevertheless the impact isn't that painful anymore because when i read yoochun's message i had felt the pain already- even without knowing that AVEX will put TVXQ's group activities in a halt for the meantime.

Right now they are concentrating on solo activities. Magazine covers, endorsements, drama, single, SOLO. Melody can be made by one person but there's no harmony if you don't do it with others. I always say that i miss them. But what is there to miss? We are still updated of what they are doing now. But when i watched a video clip of jaejoong's an-an photoshoot, i heard him sing. Then i realized what i really miss- I MISS THE HARMONY THAT TVXQ MAKE WHEN THEIR FIVE MELODIES ARE TOGETHER.

If i'm selfish enough and have the power to stop the time during the years that they were working together i would have done it. I know they need each other now, but i guess they also need to work things on their own. And with that i give them all the time they need, i won't wish for the time to stop. Let the time continue and let them work independently. Let them show the world who they are, as kim jaejoong, jung yunho, shim changmin, park yoochun and kim junsu. It's painful to watch them individually but i know though i dont see it, the bond is still there. There's still the thread connecting the five of them. Someday, i know, i'll be able to hear that harmony again that made me fall in love with them the first time i heard them sing. i can wait for as long as they want me to. I may sometimes be impatient, but i will never lose the faith. I decided to watch over this group and i will watch over them until the end- whatever end there may be. :)

TVXQ equation. :)

Recently, Junsu, Jaejoong, Yunho and Changmin have few updates of their solo activities now but none of whatsoever from Yoochun. Because of the lawsuit, they have been in a very loooooooong hiatus on Korea and they only get to work together with Japan activities. It's nice seeing their solo updates but how i wish i get updates from each of them. It's already difficult to watch them separately, so not hearing any from one of them is actually disappointing...saddening.

So with that, I formulated an equation. This is actually not new anymore. But i added a bit to the equation.

let 5 be 5.

no more.

no less.

5 - 5 = 0

5 - 4 = 0

5 - 3 = 0

5 - 2 = 0

4 > 3 > 2 > 1

but 5 is ∞.

together with variables B and C

5 (B + C)

= 5B + 5C

B and C will always be beside 5.

No operation can change that.

That is constant in all properties and frame of reference.

Now mathematicians can burn me alive. Give me consideration. I really miss them. :)

O! it's your birthday?! :)

this is a proper tribute to the one who have brought me closer with TVXQ and with the best fandom i've ever encountered. :)

When i got so addicted with KPOP my dose of KPOP news was allkpop.com. They post news of anything and everything about kpop. and then when i got under TVXQ spell i was so yearning for news about the boys. (if i remember right, i started liking TVXQ august of 2009, early lawsuit uproar.) I was waiting for news like upcoming albums, singles, any news. At first allkpop posted minor updates about the situation of TVXQ until i havent read anything anymore. That's when I landed at onetvxqforums. allkpop has always been promoting the forum whenever they have a tvxq-related post so i tried joining the forum and i'm glad i did. :)

Fansites are the leaders of the fandom, and i must say that onetvxq is good at leading. onetvxqforum is the only forum that ive joined and visited always. (actually, thanks to twitter, stalking the forum is a lot easier, one of the reason why ive made my twitter account active :D) ive never been so into forums and stuffs, but when tvxq put me under their spell, O! did the same. :) it's like a huge gathering place for tvxq international fans. you can join projects that'll show your love to tvxq, you can meet people who also adore tvxq, you can spazz things about tvxq, read news about tvxq, all about tvxq. :)

all other fansites do the same, but never have i seen the other fansite bash the other. they all aim to spread tvxq love and updates, it's a healthy competition. all the reason that i love all international tvxq fansites. :)

to onetvxqforums, thank you for feeding the tvxq hunger in my heart. to the founder, the admins, the translators, the DJs, everyone behind the forum, thank you for bringing up and keeping a place for the international fans to unite in love of tvxq. happy birthday! and i know you'll have more birthdays to come, since tvxq will reign in more years. :)

wolfpeach ^^

changminium maximized :)

what's the title about?! a new harry potter spell? haha. xD

this is soo late. the subject's birthday was two days ago. I wasn't able to participate in his trending party. I really dont have the luxury of time now (i actually have to finish this post in 30 mins.). Time, why do you tick so fast? O_O

February 18 is... my baptismal day. xD But really that's my baptismal day. Which happens to be someone's birthday as well. and that some one?

tadaa! shim changmin! (the pics on the lower left corner are too cute! and much love to his uneven eyebrows! *or whatever people call that* :D)

when i got under this TVXQ spell, I admit that i WAS a jaejoong-bias. Which means i only watch their MV's PV's, guesting and all just because of Jae. But as time went by, i realized that I LIKE THEM ALL- jaejoong, micky, xiah, yunho and changmin.

Dec. 15 is xiah's bday. and i know i was able to join the TT party for that though i was late. Jan.26 is jae's bday and i was also able to celebrate with others that day. But February is a busy month for me- and i think the most critical too. well, i wont elaborate on things. Since February is a feBUSY month, i wasnt able to do so much for the february celebrants. Feb.6, yunho's day, i wasn't feeling well. But still i tried to do something about it. But Feb. 18...

I was at school, busy rehearsing for our play (in lieu with our final exam on a certain subject) and when i got home i was busy doing our thesis with my research mates. Do you know how much i want to click-new-tab and visit twitter that day just so to tweet a happy birthday greeting to changmin?! but i just cant...

so this is what i did. Get ready for photo spam. :)

the idea started when i was having my lunch that day (Feb.18). i thought, i won't be able to greet changmin a happy birthday together with tweeps so i'll just greet him this way. :D

i wrote it on a white board...

black board...

and even on the floor or our university stage! (vandalism?! haha! i used chalk anyway so it's okay. i think. xD)

then next thing i did made me seem more weird than the usual to my classmates. My classmates (majority) are not kpop/jpop inclined. Thus when they get bored they dont borrow my mp3 player because they know that's what they would listen to. but in defense, i am not weird people. I'm just different than the ordinary. xD

so back to the photo spam. I told you that day i was busy rehearsing for a play. So during breaks, when it's not my scene, i asked my classmates to write a happy birthday greeting to shim changmin. and they don't know who he is. xD But my friends knew it. They know that this have got something to do with TVXQ. they know i'm caught under those boys' spell. my other friend even told that "she's too crazy over just a band" -- sorry dear. You just cant understand me. and don't worry, i don't understand myself either. i just know that i love them- seriously. :D

so here goes the photo spam. xD

translation: Today is Changmin's birthday! Greet him! thank you! ^^

see a hangul? she's a dear friend of mine. but she's not korean. She's just good at learning these things. She also know how to write and read basic jap. (actually i can too, but i'm too slow. it takes me minutes to read a 2-3 sentences. xD)

next photos spams are taken at home. When we were doing our thesis. I arrived home that day around 6pm and we started working right away. The trending for changmin's birthday starts 8 pm KST- that's 7 pm in my local time. so here.... :)

7:10 pm so that's 8:1o KST. I started writing happy birthday greeting's to changmin. :D (i left my research mates in the living room. i went to my room and i told them that i'll just get something. But this was what i did. xD)

you think i'm crazy? i think i am too. xD

and it didn't stop there. I thought "that was just all happy birthday happy birthday with no message at all. so. this is what i did. :D

then i had to continue working with my research mates. it would be weird if i stayed in my room longer. so there. the work continued... until i noticed that the time was already...

that's 12am KST. Feb.18 is already over...

this is actually 12:45 am. i forgot to edit it. XD

and i just realized the am/pm error by this time. Xp

the end. ^^

see? it's really "my crazy love" to all the members of TVXQ. I can't imagine doing this again to any other. just to all of you. ^^

my mom's nagging me. i really have to go. happy belated birthday changmin! ^^

checkmate. Ü

i'm really not feeling well. i had colds last thursday night and it got worst today. But that will not stop me from greeting our birthday boy today. :) *your birthday and jae's real birthday is just one day apart. yunjae fans must be happy for that fact. :p)

and the birthday boy is.... *drumroll*

leader yunho! happy birthday leader! ^^

everyone's loving your handsome poses on evisu now. but i'll go with this cute pose. :D

just recently, i was looking for a song to play on my guitar to kill the boredom. so ransacked my things looking for a song book. i was flipping the pages of it when i suddenly landed to this page.

i read somewhere that yunho was currently listening to the song "Just Once" by James Ingram. (the artist indicated on the page is our local singer. she did a remake of the song.) As much as i want to link you the source, i cant remember it anymore. It was i think already a month ago. but i know i read it at onetvxqforums so you can check it out there.

i know the song but i never really paid attention to the lyrics. so that was maybe the first time i actually read its lyrics. If leader is not just randomly listening to this song, then this might best speak what's playing on his mind now. Read the lyrics and you will know...

he is the leader. so it is just usual for him to do his best.

but it seems, that for what is happening now, he's blaming himself, for his best was not good enough. because the group are separated in two now, it's like, they're back from being strangers.

yunho gave his heart to the group, the management, he loves them more than anyone else. but it seems that this love was not enough. for the two parties can't seem to make up. and the seem-like-endless exchanges are not going anywhere.

the leader is asking just once, just another chance for them to understand everything. why can't the two just admit that they're no good without each other? do what's best and make it better? and find a way to stay together?

yunho is asking just once for them to figure out what have been kept done wrong. the good times should last . "what are we doing wrong? can't we find a way to finally make it right?" He wishes that the "magic" that happened 6 years ago will still last. but the leader hasn't lost his faith yet. He believes that they could get through it and break through it. He still, as every one else, been always keeping his faith.

the italicized part is just based on the song. i'm not someone close to yunho to speak his mind (though i really wish that i am) nor am i edward cullen to be able to read his mind. so this is just ME interpreting the song "relative" to the leader. :)

i don't know if it's just me. but if you've been watching this whole 'show' entitled "lawsuit case" ever since it began, you would definitely feel that the song is in relation with that. But who am i to know? i'm just a part of the audience.

To leader yunho:

we also wish for that magic to last.

we will always do our best to give our help.

let the cassies, bigeasts and international fans be your tinkerbells.

we'll use all our pixie dust for all of you to be able to fly again. :)

so, can i have this dance? :p

happy birthday leader!

keep grooving! ^^